Anyone plugged into the human consciousness knows the story by now.
Twitter plans to disrupt the space-time continuum at their earliest convenience by algorithmically generating our feeds based on [insert buzzword] instead of the traditional sequential #timestamped timeline we have grown accustomed to.
The announcement shook the world:
The backlash from users was immediate and severe. A new Hashtag was born #RIPTwitter
As a Power Tweetdeck user the first thing that came to my mind was how to wrap my head around this development. I did a crude mock-up and posted it.
As I watched that Tweet go viral, it occurred to me that this rip in time-fabric could potentially have far-reaching repercussions in the future – if the future even exists as it did before. I can’t help think this “Tweet That Changed the World” could take on The Butterfly Effect.
It then occurred to me that re-sequencing Tweets could be a potentially lucrative business.
It would make a great add-on for Tweetdeck. A feature – not a bug.
Speaking of features, as a power user I’ve tweeted a few ideas that I think would be much better than recent and forthcoming “enhancements” those running Twitter Inc. have forced upon their loyal user base.
Here are a few ideas I’ve previously shared on twitter – to mostly deaf ears.
1) I’d pay a few bucks a month for Twitter not to screw up anything else (excellent source of revenue)
Tweetdeck is the Crown Jewel of Twitter and I have thought of ‘tons more cool features’ than I’m posting now.
For instance, included in my “few bucks a month” for Premium Tweetdeck I’d have the ability to “edit my Tweet” when I realized I just made a typo, having hit Post. (am I the only one that’s thought of this?)
Maybe it’s the AdBlocker I use, but there are no ads or promoted Tweets in Tweetdeck. I’m fine with that, because in the “few bucks a month – feature-laden Tweetdeck” I would expect to see no ads – after all I’m paying for it now.
I have a few bucks in an old PayPal account that’s subconsciously just “digital currency” so clicking an “improve your experience and Go Twitter Pro” button wouldn’t bother me a bit. I want some Power User Features up in here right?
The fact that Tidy Cats or Meow Mix is not buying ads in my Media Gallery is a travesty. I was once told if the wrong person scrolled back through my Media Gallery far enough, I would be in big trouble – I don’t want no trouble.
Where is the “Buy It Now” Button in my timeline? Ya know, the one for stuff I already buy every month that’s “50% off today only” -impulse buy.
Another thing I’d like to see Twitter do is automatically clean up my followers so I have an idea how many real humans (and real cats) follow me. I’ve never cared about my follower count but “follower bots” add no value and I’d prefer accurate statistics over fluff.
Now don’t get me started on the Features to tag, sort and filter Tweets based on whether they are Finance, sports, politics, weather-related etc.
Perhaps I could also tag a Tweet “sarcasm” (with an accompanying font).
Speaking of Fonts, I am really in favor of only one font addition with my paid subscription to Twitter – italics. I need to italicize words sometimes, or my Tweets can be taken out of context – even misconstrued. That ever happen to you?
I have other ideas too…
How about a “save for later” tag that creates a list of Tweets (usually containing links or videos) I want to review when I have more time. The “heart” really doesn’t cut it there.
Down the road I’d like for Twitter to be able to read my mind and have the ability to just click “Post” when a thought worth sharing pops in my head. I’ve adapted well to Tweeting by speaking into my iPhone, so that’s a step in the right direction.
As a Stock Market cat I sense the pain the Twitter shareholders are feeling right now. This new idea of Twitter creating chaos out of order – is obviously not standing well with the majority of their users – and that certainly can’t be the proper way to unlock shareholder value.
So those are just a few “off the top of my head” ideas that seem to make sense.
But what do I know? I’m just a simple cat herder.
I propose Twitter take advantage of StockCats.com Consulting Services and sends a limo to my office to pick me up, forthwith. I shall be whisked away to the Ritz Carlton San Francisco where I will stay during intense “brainstorming sessions” with the top thinkers at Twitter Inc.
We shall work on a new plan – to turn around Twitter – and make both the users and shareholders happy. I’m happy to license my teams plethora of brilliant ideas which will undoubtedly improve everyone’s experience, up and down the food chain.
As we like to say around here at StockCats.com, “we’ve barely scratched the surface”. I recently characterized the potential for a Twitter turn-around and several people actually agreed.
Stay cautiously optimistic my friends…